LOST RECAPS

Previously on Lost: Keamy gets the secondary protocol out the safe; Keamy knows where Linus is going once they torch the island; Keamy gives Frank a hard time about gassing up the chopper; a sat phone is thrown out of the chopper as it flies over the beach; Locke goes into the cabin and kicks it with a shadowy Christian Shephard figure who claims to speak on Jacob’s behalf; Locke tells Ben and Hugo that Jacob wants them to move the island.

Now on Lost? We’re in the clouds.

Maybe.

Pull back and we’re in an airplane.

Maybe.

I trust nothing this season.

Two guys in Coast Guard Air Station uniforms are in the cockpit. The co-pilot strokes a rabbit’s foot. The pilot tells him to put it away. “We need this thing,” he says. “With the cargo we got back there? Bad mojo.” The pilot addresses a Miss Decker sitting behind them, asking her to let “them” in the back know they’re landing.

“We’re coming in for a landing. It’s a military facility just west of Honolulu. It’s completely private. Your families are already here.”

“Now, there’s a lot of press that wants to speak to you, but as far as Oceanic is concerned, you don’t have to speak to any reporters.”

No one responds. Then jack responds, “We’ll talk to them.” Decker asks if that’s alright with all of them. “It’s fine, we all agreed,” says Jack. “We just – we just want to get it over with.”

Jack looks shady as hellllllll.

“Okay,” nods Decker. “Um, they’re referring to you as the Oceanic 6. That’s not the best branding as far as we’re concerned, but it’s catchy.” Oceanic 666 would be catchier and more satanic, but whatever. “We’ll see you on the ground.” Then she walks back to the cockpit.

“We all know the story,” says Jack. “If we get any questions that we don’t want to answer, or that we can’t answer, let’s just keep our mouths shut.”

“It’s okay,” says Jack, “they’ll think that we’re in shock.” Sun points out that they ARE in shock. “Well, then this should be easy,” deadpans Jack. But the camera stays on him for a couple of seconds, and it’s clear that there’s more to this coverup.

So the plane lands, and in classic Lost form, a scene you once wished for these characters – getting back to their families, getting off a weird-ass island – seems like more of a curse.

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Notes: Sun doesn’t look her father in the eyes, Hurley should adopt Sayid, Jack’s mom looks like she might know what’s going on and that guy over Kate’s shoulder should totally ask her out.

So what the deal is? Are they really going back to their real lives? Have they crossed into an alternate timeline that may or may not lead to the “flash-forwards” of Season 4? How are there physical and mental states tied into the location, mechanics and effects of that crazy island? As the Smoke Monster manifests itself in a variety of ways, could these characters’ entire perception of reality be a result of multiple realities bleeding into their current state of existence? And were there lives wrapped up in the time-traveling inhabitants of this island long before they ever got here?

(Answers: No, Yes, TBD, Yes, Yes.)

Back on the island, Rose still thinks it’s Sayid and Desmond on the chopper. RIght, and they’re just taking it for a spin before they pick you up. Jack gives Daniel the sat phone and trusts him to make the calll, which also doesn’t make much sense, but let’s go with it. Dan puts it on the useful “monitor only” setting, which picks up Keamy yelling about deploying to the Orchid as soon as they hit the ground.

Dan knows what’s up. But Jack doesn’t ask Dan about The Orchid, he asks Juliet, who says she doesn’t know what it is. Hey braniac, ask Dan! Jack and Kate split up to get guns and water, and Juliet resumes her role of nagging doctor person, but Jack’s like nah, gotta get these people off the island homie.

Meanwhile, Daniel is rummaging around for his diary. Charlotte asks what’s wrong. “Charlotte, did you hear what he said? They’re going to The Orchid! They’re using the secondary protocol.”

“What are you talking about?”

“We have to get off this island. Right now.”

L O S T

Break.

Jack and Kate are going after the chopper. Jack’s bleeding through his t-shirt. He says it’s just discharge. Dirty! Kate calls him out for lying about not bleeding. She deduces this from the large, red blood mark on his shirt, and from her observation that he looks her right in the eyes when he lies to her. That’s our Jack.

There’s a noise in the woods. It’s Miles! And Sawyer. And Aaron. Kate asks where Claire is. We lost her in the middle of the night, says Sawyer, hoped she was at the beach, Nah, says Jack. There’s a lot of back and forth between Jack and Sawyer about whose plan is better, if it’s Sayid and Des or not, whether Locke is right, whether Jack is right, the whole nine.

Sawyer has a few curious lines in this scene: “I’m sorry, Doc, maybe this is deja vu. Didn’t you just do the whole ‘run through the jungle with a walkie’ plan?” jack says blah, chopper, getting off island. “What is with you and getting off the island? You’re like a damn broken record,” says Sawyer. That’s two big time-warp allusions in a row, a nice followup to Horace’s repeated rechopping of the same tree last week.

Jack takes responsibility for sending Des and Sayid on the chopper and says he’s going after it whether it’s them or not. Go Jack! Love him or hate him, Jack keeps it moving when it’s time for it to be kept moving. Sawyer decides to man up as well. “That son of a bitch is stubborn,” he mutters. “Hold up! You don’t get to die alone.” Been a while since these two teamed up. It’s finale time.

“Based on the location of the wreckage, our best estimate of the crash site is here.”

“From there, the survivors were carried by the ocean’s current to here, an uninhabited island in the lesser Sunda islands known as Membata.”

“As you’ve all read in your briefing books, on Day 103, a typhoon washed up the remnants of an Indonesian fishing boat, including basic supplies and a survival craft.” Do you remember that? I don’t. “On Day 108, the remaining six survivors – including Miss Austen’s baby, which she gave birth to on the island of Membata – used this raft to journey here, an island called Sumba.”

Wow, I don’t remember Kate giving birth to a baby on Membata, do you? Not before they went to Sumba, anyway.

“They then came ashore near a village called Manukangga. This photo was taken by the local fishermen that found them.”

“Once it was discovered who they were, they were transported to Honolulu by the U.S. Coast Guard. As you can imagine, this has been an extraordinarily trying experience. They have, however, agreed to answer a few questions, so, ladies and gentlemen, the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815.”

A brick wall emerges, and Jack begins his standup act. “Hi everybody, my name’s Jack Shephard. People say, is it hard being a Shephard? I tell them, well it’s a tough job, but I have a great staff. Get it? Shephard? Staff? A great staff! Ha!” Everyone laughs politely.

Going back to what actually happens on the show, the first reporter asks Jack what it was like when the plane hit the ocean, and how they survived. “Um…it…it happened really fast. I remember the impact.”

“I remember the plane filling up with water. A group of us got to the emergency door and got out before it went down.”

“And those of you who survived, you swam to the island?”

“No. We had cushions. We had some…lifejackets.”

Sayid makes a face.

“We were in the water for over a day when the current took us in. By then, there was only eight of us left.”

Sun makes another face. Okay, so Jack is lying his ass off, which is really disturbing. I know I’m one of a dwindling group of Jack supporters, but this has to be something he’s doing for the greater good, right? Jack wouldn’t have an active, nefarious role in the coverup, would he? I sense that Christian is going to communicate with Jack in the finale and change the game in a big way. Who else could persuade Jack not to tell the truth? Does anyone else wield that kind of influence over Jack? I’m way out on a limb, aren’t I.

Anyway, the next reporter says they all look pretty healthy for spending over 100 days on an island. Hurley’s like, you talkin’ to me? People laugh. Then she says, “Well, actually, Mr. Reyes, you were worth more than $150 million at the time of your…death.” Weird pause and expression! “How does it feel to know you’re going to get all of that money back.” Hugo says he doesn’t want it back, it was bad luck. Cheech Marin looks disappointed, as if he actually thinks he was going to get some of the money in real life.

Next up, a Korean reporter asks Sun if Jin was one of the people who died on the island. Jack GLARES at her. She says, “The answer is no. He never made it off the plane.” Damn!

Next, the same guy who asked the first question asks Kate the third. Let someone else have a turn, damn. “Miss Austen, what was it like giving birth on the island?”

“Scary.”

“Your son, uh, Aaron? How old is he now?”

“He’s just a little over five weeks.”

“Sooo that would have made you about…six months pregnant when the U.S. Marshalls service apprehended you in Australia for an outstanding murder warrant, is that correct?”

Decker is not having any mess. “Uh, I’m afraid Miss Austen’s legal issue is off the table. Next question.”

So the Bridget Jones lady who asked the second question stands up to ask the fourth question! What’s going on?! She asks Sayid if it’s possible that there are other survivors. “No,” he states with conviction. “Absolutely not.”

The world’s biggest bunch of bullcrappers leaves the press conference. Decker follows Sayid out to ask where he got his suit. “Men’s Wearhouse,” he states with conviction. She lets him know that there’s someone waiting for him – as a reward for lying about the survivors, I guess. Guess who?

“Nadia!”

Nadia.

“Nadia.”

Nadia.

Back on the island, Sayid is back from the freighter. Everyone rolls up. He says he’s taking people six at a time before they all get kilt. But Jack and Kate ran after the chopper, says Juliet. Uh-oh, says everyone’s faces.

Break.

Hugo wants to know where they’re going. “We’re going to a place called The Orchid, Hugo.” What’s that? “It’s a greenhouse.” Why we going there, exactly? “You heard John, we’re going to move the island.” Right, and how we gonna do that? “Very carefully.”

“Well, if you could move the island whenever you wanted, why didn’t you just move it before those psychos with guns got here?”

“Because doing it is both dangerous and unpredictable. It’s a measure of last resort.”

“Awesome.”

Ben pulls out a box, but Locke says he’ll open it himself. Why’s that? Does Locke really think he is some sort of chosen spiritual figure? Doubtful, son. Locke finds some Dharma crackers and throws them to Hurley, who eats them. Locke finds a mirror. “May I have that mirror, please?” Ben takes it, then turns to Hugo.

“You know those are fifteen years old.”

Appropriate, as this episode has moments of staleness all too familiar for a pre-finale ep, moments when characters are simply being brought up to speed and set into place for the impending conflict.

Anyway, Ben shines the mirror at the mountain, and Locke uses some binoculars to look at the responding flash of light, which is kind of pointless, since Ben can see it without binoculars. Hurley and Locke ask Ben what he’s going, but he won’t say who it is or who the message is from. Good times! Ben back in control.

On the beach, Daniel tells Sayid he’ll start taking people back. Sure, says Sayid, go for it. What?! What?! Why do people trust Daniel? I guess they’re in a hurry and there’s a finale to get in position for. Then Kate shows up with Aaron and gives him to Sun so she can go back after Jack. So Daniel gets in the boat with Sun, Aaron, Jin and a bunch of extras. “I told you I’d get you off the island,” says Jin. Yeah, way to make it happen!

As Sun walks up a lot of steps to her dad’s office, we see Mr. Paik berating some underlings. “How could this happen?!” Sun asks if she’s interrupting. He says it’s just business, nothing she’d understand. So what’s good with your pregnancy?

Time to face off. In Korean. With subtitles. The highlights:

Take that, take that!

And Sun fans rejoice.

We join Hurley as he walks into his house, supposedly off the island. He’s scared of a bunch of stuff not happening in his empty house, but it turns out there is something nefarious going on – everyone’s hiding to surprise him with a party. Kate’s there, Sayid & Nadia are there, it’s a party!

Sayid comments on the interesting choice of an island theme. “Yeah, Mom really doesn’t get it, dude.” Is this really happening? It’s a weird ep.

Hugo’s dad takes him away from the party to show him his present – he fixed the Camaro! It’s pretty cool. Hurley appreciates it. He gets in. Still cool. Then he looks at the odometer.

The numbers!! More like the uh-ohdometer.

Hurley starts screaming about the numbers. “Wow, what a coincidence,” says Hurley’s dad.

Hurley doesn’t see it that way.

Back on the island, Hurley has some questions for Ben. “Okay, let’s say this greenhouse place does what you say. And yeah, I get it, it’s really dangerous and unpredictable. But suppose, somehow, it works, and we move the island. Doesn’t that mean the dudes with guns move, too?”

“Yes, I suppose they would.”

“Well, isn’t that, you know, a problem?”

“I’m working on it.”

“Well what about me? I still wanna get off it!”

“I’m afraid it’s a little late for that, Hugo,” says Locke. As usual, Locke has his head way up his ass.

Ben sees something and gets down on the ground, get-get-gets down on the ground. Ben asks for the binoculars and tells the boys to get down lower on the ground. Why would we want to do that, says Locke, who apparently is waiting for Jacob to tell him everything now. “Because we’re at The Orchid.”

Locke loads his gun. “What are we waiting for?”

“We’re waiting, John, because Charles Widmore, the man who’s trying to capture me and kill all the rest of you, knows about this place and knows what we need is inside.”

Locke is frustrated. “I thought you said you had no idea why he was trying to find the island.”

“I wasn’t being entirely truthful.”

“Yeah, when are you ever entirely truthful?” Come on, Locke, get over it.

Ben hands the binoculars to Locke. “Watch the plants at the back.” It’s the mercenary dudes. “They’re already here.” Guess the finale isn’t going to be the cakewalk we all expected with that creampuff Keamy getting walked all over.

Break.

Daniel and his boatload of real and fake Lost characters get to the freighter. Des helps them up. Dan heads back for the next group. Des waves, and then hesitates a bit. Has Des been through this before? Something fishy’s going on, and no, that’s not an ocean joke.

“Engine’s fixed. Tell Hendrix to try it.”

Oh, the shame.

Desmond tells Hendrix to try the engines. They work! Okay, says Des, take us to the island, but stay on the bearing 305. Sounds easy! But it’s not. Hendrix can’t get the boat working. There’s some kind of RF interference, which doesn’t make sense to Des because the radio room isn’t broadcasting, but Hendrix says there’s something broadcasting, and if they don’t turn it off, he’s not getting any closer to the island. Des is like, “Aight, bet. Let me find that there.”

Back on the island! Sawyer notices Jack’s bloody shirt. “Cut yourself shaving?”

“Juliet took out my appendix a couple of days ago.”

“You’re kidding me!”

“Nope.”

“What else did I miss?”

No more time to chat, we’re at the signal. And it’s the chopper. And Frank is handcuffed to it. Turns out Frank is the one who threw the sat phone, so that they could find him and get flown back to the boat. He tells Jack and Sawyer that the mercenaries are at some greenhouse waiting to catch Ben Linus. Sawyer’s like, Yo Jack, Hugo’s with Ben. “Son of a bitch,” says Jack.

Whoa!

We’re at Christian’s funeral. I wouldn’t bet on that.

Jack starts telling some BS story about his father’s eulogy, which ends up being his father’s eulogy. Blah, blah, blah. “Bye, Dad. I loved you. I miss you.”

Afterwards, Jack’s mom gives him a hug. “I love you , sweetheart.”

“I love you, Mom.”

“I’m so glad you’re home.” Ah, but is he home? This doesn’t feel like home.

Jack, Kate and Aaron are the only ones left when a woman approaches them.

“Excuse me,” she says to Jack, “May I have a word with you?”

It’s Claire’s mom! Guess she was faking that coma. “Mr. Shephard, I’m very sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you. How did you know my father?”

“I believe I’m the reason he was in Australia when he died.”

“I’m sorry, why would he have come to see you?”

“He didn’t come to see me. I was still in the hospital. I never saw him. He came to see his daughter – my daughter, Mr. Shephard.”

“My father didn’t have a daughter.”

“Yes, he did. And if you don’t believe me, check his phone records. Would you like to know the strangest thing about all this, Mr. Shephard? My daughter was on your plane, too. She was on Flight 815. You were in the air for six hours, probably just a few rows from her, and you never even knew she was your sister. She was one of the one who died when your plane hit the water. Her name was Claire.”

“I didn’t mean to burden you with this, but you needed to know. I’m sorry for your loss.”

Carole “Claire’s Mom” Littleton walks over to Kate. “Your son is beautiful.”

Busted?

Break.

On the freighter, Sun asks Michael how the heck he got back to New York. “Oh, Walt and I, ahhh, uhhh, we took Ben’s boat and we followed his bearing. In a couple of days we came to an island, you know, with people.” Nice island! “I sold the boat, hopped a cargo ferry back to the States. Didn’t tell anybody who we were.”

“And now you’re working for Ben.”

Michael gets mad. “I do not work for Ben. I’m trying to make up for what I did, I’m trying to help you out here!” He tells Sun to translate what he said. Jin is like, I heard you dog.

Des interrupts to bring everyone downstairs. Guess what’s down there?

Explosive stuff, that’s what. Maybe the freighter’s not as safe as Frank thought. But Frank seems pretty on point! I’m confused.

In the jungle, Kate and Sayid are doing there thing when Kate finds the tracks they’ve followed double back behind them. They draw their guns and shout out to whoever’s there. Guess who’s there?

Richard is. He has his hands up and tells them to put their guns down. Suddenly, a bunch of Others pop up with guns. “I said drop your guns,” says Richard. He takes their guns. No more guns for you.

Over by The Orchid, Team Awesome gets ready to do stuff.

“Listen to me very carefully, John, because I’m not going to have time to repeat this. You’re going to go into that greenhouse through that hole there. Once inside you’re going to turn left. Go about twenty paces until you see a patch of antheureyums on your left. They’re in an alcove against the north wall. Face that wall, reach down with your left hand. You’ll find a switch that activates the elevator. The elevator takes you down to the actual Orchid station.”

Hurley chimes in: “Whoa, wait. What?”

“Okay,” says Locke, “i’m sorry, Ben, but maybe I missed the part when you explain what I’m supposed to do about the armed men inside?”

“I’m going to take care of them.”

“And how the hell are you going to do that?”

“How many times do I have to tell you, John? I always have a plan.” That’s my Ben!

So Ben starts heading towards The Orchid, which means it’s time for the frustrating, pre-finale montage. You’ve got Sun going up on deck with Aaron, Sawyer and a tired-looking Jack on the move, The Others walking with captured Kate and Sayid, Hurley and Locke being useless and, finally, Ben arriving at The Orchid with his hands up.

“My name is Benjamin Linus. I believe you’re looking for me?”

Then Keamy looks over at Omar, draws his gun, puts it to Ben’s head and knocks him out. Not cool at all! I’m not taking any pictures of it out of protest.

So that’s it for two weeks? Two weeks is a long time to wait. I’d rather watch it next week. Who’s with me? Someone with a copy of the finale, I hope? Oh well.

Time to replay the entire season so far and speculate wildly. Do join me with your crazy season-ending theories in the comments.

In the meantime, check out some other stuff on Lost Recaps:

Promo trailer for Season 4, Episode 13: There’s No Place Like Home (Part 2) Season Finale!

Promo trailer for Season 4, Episode 12: There’s No Place Like Home (Part 1)

Season 4, Episode 11: Cabin Fever recap

Sneak Peek video clips from Season 4, Episode 11: Cabin Fever

Promo trailers from Season 4, Episode 11: Cabin Fever

Season 4, Episode 9: The Shape of Things to Come recap

Season 4, Episode 8: Meet Kevin Johnson recap

Season 4, Episode 7: Ji Yeon recap

Season 4, Episode 6: The Other Woman recap

Season 4, Episode 6: The Other Woman recap